Cancelling Your Pity Party
I used to be a pity party animal. Whenever something wouldn't go my way, I would beat myself up about and attempt to get as much of a response from my friends as possible. I thought that these "parties" were making me feel better in some way. In actuality, they weren't only bringing me down in the present, but they were keeping me from developing the attitude I needed to be successful creatively. If you want to be a successful, mature, positive artist, it's time to cancel your pity party.
Whining and crying in an effort to get sympathy from your friends and loved ones seems like it would be healthy in some instances. Obviously, if something major has happened to you like an illness, death or divorce, you can't be faulted for having an emotional reaction and requiring some comfort. If you didn't get an assignment done on time or you had a hard time finishing your daily writing, this is not a pity party worthy event. If you add too much weight and negativity to a small mistake, an error in judgment or a lack of motivation, you are increasing the chances that these events will happen again. If you make the tiny things huge, you won't be able to beat them when it counts.
If, on the other hand, you learn to let these smaller obstacles roll off your back, allowing you to remain optimistic in the face of adversity, you are bound to succeed. Attempting to attain emotional mastery has been one of the major keys in my personal success story. When I made a conscious effort to take all complaining out of my life (even about the small things) my life made a serious change for the better. I had more energy to throw behind my work, because I wasn't spending it on trifles like oversleeping or getting overcharged at the restaurant. I focused instead on the best things that had happen that day or week and I felt clearer and more creative.
I still occasionally slip back into pity party mode and at such a time it's important to get myself out of the muck as quickly as possible. First, I snap myself out of it. I do this by walking away from the area I'm having this emotional issue in, literally putting distance between myself and the situation, closing my eyes and taking a deep breath. If you're familiar with it, I thoroughly recommend that you take part in the Sedona Method, an emotional release technique. I dive into something positive like a positive affirmation, a motivational audio track or a positive blog to get me out of the dumps. Then, I focus back on my work and power through it until the emotional issue is gone.
There it is, three steps: snap, dive and focus. If you are a frequent pity party planner, practice these three steps to cancel the party and go on living your life.
Done with Cancelling Your Pity Party? Go back to Motivation Techniques.